Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Umm I'm too high to move.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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