And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize