we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
