The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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