I have demons in me.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I touched a dick in church today
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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