Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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