there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
