Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
