i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just found puke in my bra..
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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