i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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