i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize