I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Princesses don't give blow jobs
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
