Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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