After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize