Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
