Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
this just has baby written all over it
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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