I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
