I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
