the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
