if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
