Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
