I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
The best revenge is premature balding
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
