Porn is love you can see.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
