It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
