the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
