i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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