Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
