I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
the day after is always just damage control
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize