You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
