K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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