Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize