He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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