You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
