i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
