You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Damn victory sex feels great
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
