Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
