Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
