one two three fourrrrnication!
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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