): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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