My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
