Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize
