Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize