whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
oh god the rape fog is back!
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
