There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
