You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
this will be a night to untag.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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