her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
My bed is full of blood and feathers
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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