Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
