i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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