you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
