i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
